Dealing With Our Subconscious.
I posted something around a year ago about the effects of our subconscious activities. If we are even interested in coming to understand our subconscious, it means dealing with a number of paradoxes, the first of which is that it exists at all! Most people live their lives as if it didn’t exist, which truth be told, is a reasonable assumption, given what one can see of the subconscious. That is to say, nothing.
Nothing at all.
It is literally invisible, imperceptible and as the autistic person might say, ‘utterly beyond me’. Anything to do with the subconscious is so far from our own experience that it really is a foreign land.
Only there’s always a clue, because whilst we are unaware of our subconscious, that doesn’t mean it doesn’t take part in our life. Before I embark on that, I want to take one more step, and say that when confronted with something that lies in our subconscious, it is like having a sword driven into one. Or having a light shone into the tenderest area of one’s mind. In short, it is extremely unpleasant.
It is for this reason that dealing with one’s subconscious is always a challenge, and that is what this post is all about.
How The Subconscious Manifests itself.
But first, back on track: whilst we are utterly unaware of our subconscious, that doesn’t mean it doesn’t affect the things we do. All it means is that we’re unaware of doing them… and this is where the danger arises.
Because if we’re unaware of the things we do that are the result of our subconscious, that doesn’t mean that other people can’t see it. Which is the key to the whole affair. Whilst you are unaware of your subconscious deeds, other people will still react to them! What is more, their reactions will feel like an impertinence, or worse, a direct attack on your good self.
Most people take this at face value: the other person is offensive and is thoroughly anti-social. If you are reading this, and have any self-consciousness at all, then the next time this happens, ask yourself this question: “is this me, or is this them?”
There are ways to tell if it is you, your good self who is at fault, but the feelings involved are truly subtle. So subtle that it will take years for someone to develop the sensitivity to discern them. (If you know what I’m talking about, and can feel them, let me know and we’ll discuss our findings, okay?) For the moment, accept the fact that the person you are speaking with may be reacting to something you did.
There is only one way to find out, and that is to see if it happens again. In fact the easiest way is to try and arrange for yourself the same circumstances, and see if it does happen again!
I will remind you that you have no access to your subconscious from within yourself. But the process I have laid out here is one way to determine what does lie within your subconscious. Because if the person you are speaking with is reflecting something you are doing without being aware of it, you now have an idea of what you are looking for.
In modern psychology the situation I have described is termed ‘projection’ in older traditions it is called mirroring, which is rather more accurate.
The point is that you now know what to do about it.
Reverse-Engineering The Subconscious.
Putting this the other way around, if one is unaware that the world is a reflection of your inner self, you are more than likely to see it as a threat. Any businessman who uses words like ‘competition’ has fallen for this. He is seeing his competitors not as mirrors of himself, but as threats to his existence. The process here is negative, and extremely powerful and extremely destructive – both in the worlds of one’s psychology and one’s business.
I will explain: if someone feels threatened by the society they live in, they aren’t likely to want to go out and meet people. For one thing, they will be defensive towards others, which usually means they won’t be comfortable expressing themselves.
Look on any comment thread, and see those who post inanities. These are people who do not wish to express their own inner thoughts because of the dangerous reactions they may receive, should they do so. The problem is subtle, but very, very real. This very lack of practice means that they are unable to deal with that which is outside them, and they then become less able to deal with society, and the noose tightens around their neck, as it were. I have dealt with the causes of dementia elsewhere, suffice it to say that this is the noose I speak of.
These occur when too many outside threats accumulate at one instant, usually at a time of stress or too much work. That is to say, at the very moment one needs it least! The world outside breaks through one’s defences and the sea pours in. Is it any wonder that people feel helpless when they feel as if they are drowning? Is it any wonder that they should seek to re-establish the dams and dykes to stop the water from coming in again?
If so, they missed an opportunity to see the world as it really is. This will be the topic of an upcoming post that will deal with one person’s work to bring this about, but in a way that is truly healthy.
After all, I experienced this on the back of a bus in Stuttgart, and I learned a very great deal from its happening.
How many other people would have taken the route I did, and examine myself rather than blaming society for its evils? Because when you see people blaming, you know they are taking the unhealthy route. What is more, they will be so intent on avoiding the evils of the world, that they will shut themselves off from it altogether – like some director in his eyrie at the top of his skyscraper, with floors and floors of his staff to protect him from the world.
Perhaps now you will realize why it is so hard to phone a business? Why their websites never tell you what you need to know, why they seem to be talking to themselves? When you see this in a person, you know they are avoiding their life’s challenges. That is to say, they can’t listen.
As I say, my next post in this series will deal with someone who has met their challenges. He is a man who does listen, and if you ever meet such a person, make sure you stay friends because they are as rare as hen’s teeth.
It didn’t take long, it mightn’t even have lasted ninety seconds. The effect on me was profound and rumbled on for the next four weeks. You see, it was at the time of a housemove – not just in the city, but to Britain. No mean consideration, lots to doubt about and plenty of stress! There was the flat and its contents, storage, new homes in the UK, transport, jobs and goodness knows what else.
And on top of all this… BANG!!